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Monday, July 12, 2010


I never imagined I would be a blogger...I never imagined I could openly express these feelings...I never imagined people would read what I wrote...But, then again...I never imagined it would take us 4 years to get pregnant and have a baby...and I never imagined in my worst nightmare that my baby would die.

Without the love and support from family, friends, and other baby-loss mommies, I don't know what I would have done.  I probably would have felt like this sign:

Fortunately for me though, I have my family and friends...I have all these wonderful people in the baby-loss community who have reached out to me...I have found that I enjoy blogging.  So, I don't feel like there is "no outlet". 

Blogging in one of my outlets.  It allows me to express what I am feeling.  If I am having a horrible day...I can write about it.  If I'm having a better day...I can write about.  Someone out there understands.  I can express my emotions...I can express how I am feeling...I may not always do it, but the option is there.

Exercising has been another outlet.  Doing a few miles on the treadmill always seems to release some frustration.  It also allows for me to get lost in my thoughts.  It lets me think about Bailey.  It's let me have those thoughts all to myself...nobody to talk to me and no one to interrupt me.  It's my time.  It lets me think about what I want my Picture of the Day to be, or what I want to write about.  It gives me so many options.

What is your outlet?  Is it a new-found outlet or one you've always had?


Dana said...

Blogging has definitely been my outlet. I don't know what I would have done without being able to write in my blog and on the baby loss support boards. The writing is therapeutic and the comments and responses I get from others who have walked on my shoes has helped enormously.

I also never thought that I would be a blogger, but here I am and I can't imagine not doing it.

Violet1122 said...

Writing in my blog has been a sanity-saver for me. I've met so many wonderful people, people I've never met, but think about during the day. And it seems totally natural. I love it.

My other outlet is my evening walks. I go just before the sun goes down. I bring my music to listen to, or I just think and listen to the evening breeze. I look forward to my walk every day.

Anonymous said...

My blog is my main outlet. followed by taking photographs. : )

Love you.

Allison said...

Talking with my husband and blog writing have been my main outlets. These two constants have kept me from going too far into my grief.
PS. Thank you for your message about Arkansas. :) (((Hugs)))

Julie said...

i so agree with all of this. like you, i never expected to be a blogger or an exerciser. not just my own blog, but yours and others. i NEED to read these blogs. i NEED to hear that other women are going through the exact same thing that i am. and i NEED to know that there are people out there who don't think i'm crazy or selfish for thinking and feeling the way i do.